I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
Dear Nagi, I’ve burst into tears several times today thinking of you both. I looked up the very first picture of Dozer you sent me almost three years ago when I was lucky enough to discover you both! Like you and Dozer, there was just me and Daisy so I fully understand what you are going through and I thought after 5 mths I’d never get through it even ringing counsellors but a “new” 6 yr old Havanese has joined “us” and made my days brighter . Huge hugs to you xx💕
You gave Dozer a wonderful life Nagi. Condolences on your loss.
I can only say how sorry I am for the loss of your beautiful boy. Rest Peacefully Dozer❤️
What sad news, he was a truly beautiful boy. Thinking of you from N.Ireland xx
It’s with tears streaming down my face that I type this Nagi. Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful boy with us and your heartbreak at his passing. Not everyone will understand your grief but losing a beloved dog like Dozer is so painful. My heart goes out to you. One day you will be able to remember him without tears but until then, cry as much as you need to and know we are all sending you tonnes of love xxx
I am so terribly sorry to hear about your beloved Dozer.
I know the pain too well- I just had to put down my 11 year old Great Dane. It’s the worst. They love us unconditionally and are here such a short time. Sending hugs from Texas. I’m so very sorry. 💔
Dozer was so loved.
My deepest condolences…..
So sorry for your loss Nagi.
It is so hard to say goodbye to our beautiful dogs.
Dozer has earnt his wings. Say hi to LuLu if you see her
Love
Mary and BooBoo
💜🐾💜🐾💜
We lost our golden, Sally, after 12 years and held her while the vet put her down. Our three boys immediately asked when we could get another puppy. Lucy arrived soon after, and she filled the void. No dog will ever replace Dozer, but I believe you can love another.
I am deeply saddened by your loss. Love from Indonesia
Helmut
My heart is breaking for you. The silence & emptiness that comes in their absence is so hard to bear. I am sending you hugs and love and hope you are doing ok. xx
Hi Nagi, I’m so sorry to read about Dozer. I have really enjoyed all the Dozer stories you shared, so can only imagine the sorrow and emptiness you must be feeling. He really was a special dog and you both had a beautiful relationship. We will all miss him, along with you. Best wishes and may little Dozer RIP xxx
I am reading your post and I am crying while typing my comment. I had experienced the same thing last year. One day the tears won’t be freely flowing but remember the most beautiful feelings you felt during the time you had with each other. RIP beautiful Dozer
There are no words to convey my sorrow for both of you.
He will always be in your heart.
xoxo
You and Dozer led a great life together and your love for each other brought such happy years together. It will be tough now that Dozer has passed but hopefully you will one day think it’s time to have another pet to make wonderful memories together. For now, I will be thinking of you .
I was in tears reading your final goodbye. It resonated . I had to say goodbye to my boy 1.5 yrs ago. Your boy will always hold a special place in your heart and never forgotten xoxo
Oh Nagi – my heart just broke for you, and I am so sorry to hear about your loss of Dozer. I promise with time, you will look at his photos and smile. Sending you lots of love from Cupertino, CA – USA
I just wanted to send you some love during this incredibly hard time. Losing a dog means losing a piece of your heart, and I’m sorry you’re going through that. Your bond was obvious, and your love gave him such a beautiful life. Thinking of you and wishing you comfort as you grieve.
Sending love from San Diego, CA 💕
I am so sorry for your loss, cannot stop crying as I’m reading your post. Sending love xx
My heart is breaking for you Nagi. We lost our Goldie Barney after 14 fabulous years and still miss him terribly after 2 years. You will eventually lessen the grief but you never forget your beautiful fur babies. RIP Dozer 💙
Sending you much love, strength ands hugs during this difficult time. Dozer will be greatly missed.
Love,
Marina