I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
Nagi- I have been following you for a few years and love your recipes. Thank you!
We had to put our dog, Micy down on the 3rd of February and this week has been so rough. Crying with you. They have given us so much love and joy and we have given it back to them the same.
To Micy and Dozer, you will be forever loved in our hearts. Feeling the pain across the world together!
As someone who has been there, there are no words I can say to make you feel better, they just don’t exist. This pain is like no other.
But in time you will heal. You will be able to look back and smile. Until then, stay strong. You were an amazing dog Mom and Dozer knew it. You were both lucky to have each other.
Grief moves at its own pace Nagi. Lots of love and prayers xx
My heartfelt condolences, Nagi.
I’m so sorry Nagi. Dozer was a comfort to you and and friend from a distance to us all. May he rest in peace. Love, Vivien x
Only some one who has ever had a privilege to own a dog will know this pain. They are family. Beautiful creatures created by God for his purpose to serve and protect. It is very hard to say goodbye!
Dear Nagi
Thank you for the love you gave to Dozer. I know he loved you even more. That’s what dogs do. We are all so blessed to have a chance to share some time with these beautiful souls. It’s just never long enough.
My most sincere condolences on the loss of your friend, partner.and taste tester. Mourn him for now, but remember him forever.
Dear Nagi, I am writing this with tears pouring down my face. My heart breaks for you.
You were blessed to have that beautiful boy Dozer & his unconditional love.
So sorry for your loss. He was one beautiful boy and will be sadly missed by everyone around the world
Dearest Nagi
My heart and soul cry for your loss, Dozer was your child/fur baby, words will never fill your loss but know Dozer is at peace but he will be there beside you every day etched in your memory forever. Love & prayers always…
So very sorry to hear about your loss, Dozer was part of your whānau, heartbreaking that he is no longer with you. I’ve loved sharing Dozer’s story. Sending hugs…arohanui
I am so sorry to hear about Dozer’s passing. I have been there, and it’s so very hard.
So very sorry, Nagi. Rip, Dozer.
Dear Nagi, Thank you for sharing your heartbreaking journey with us, what a beautiful soul Dozer was, You will always carry him with you. I know this journey as well, immense grief is the price we pay for this deep love 💔
💔 All around the world, we mourn the passing of your sweet Dozer. And we all hold out our arms to hold YOU up.
YES, you will reach a day when you can speak Dozer’s name without a tear, but it will take a long time. Let yourself grieve as long as it takes. (When our Nacho passed, I cried every day for a year. But it was the right thing for me.)
You and Dozer have touched hearts and brightened lives all over the world. I hope you can feel our love coming to you now. ❤️
Dear Nagi. Tears for you & beautiful Dozer. Take care of yourself & I hope you take comfort in knowing that Dozer knew how much you love him🩵🩵
I am do sorry to hear about Dozer’s passing. I have been there, and it’s so very hard.
We will all feel the absence of his presence. He was a wonderful boy. Sending love and hugs to both of you. xx
So.very sorry about Dozer. Sending you a healing hug.
Dear Nagi, so sorry for Dozer and you. It’s always so difficult. When you find a moment please read this from the great Eugene O’Neill: The Last Will & Testament of an Extremely Loved Dog
by Eugene O’Neill
I, Silverdene Emblem O’Neill (familiarly known to my family, friends and
acquaintances as Blemie), because the burden of my years and infirmities is heavy
upon me, and I realize the end of my life is near, do hereby bury my last will and
testament in the mind of my Master. He will not know it is there until after I am
dead. Then, remembering me in his loneliness, he will suddenly know of this
testament, and I ask him to inscribe it as a memorial to me.
I have little in the way of material things to leave. Dogs are wiser than men. They do
not set great store upon things. They do not waste their days hoarding property.
They do not ruin their sleep worrying about how to keep the objects they have, and
to obtain objects they have not. There is nothing of value I have to bequeath except
my love and my loyalty. These I leave to all those who have loved me, especially to
my Master and Mistress, who I know will mourn me the most.
I ask my Master and my Mistress to remember me always, but not to grieve for me
too long. In my life, I have tried to be a comfort to them in time of sorrow, and a
reason for added joy in their happiness. It is painful for me to think that even in
death I should cause them pain. Let them remember that while no dog has ever had
a happier life (and this I owe to their love and care for me), now that I have grown
blind and deaf and lame, and even my sense of smell fails me so that a rabbit could
be right under my nose and I might not know, my pride has sunk to a sick,
bewildered humiliation. I feel life is taunting me with having over lingered my
welcome. It is time I said good-bye, before I become too sick a burden on myself
and on those who love me.
It will be a sorrow to leave them, but not a sorrow to die. Dogs do not fear death as
men do. We accept it as part of life, not as something alien and terrible which
destroys life. What may come after death, who knows?
I would like to believe that there is a Paradise. Where one is always young and full-
bladdered. Where all the day one dillies and dallies. Where each blissful hour is
mealtime. Where in the long evenings there are a million fireplaces with logs forever
burning, and one curls oneself up and blinks into the flames and nods and dreams,
remembering the old brave days on earth and the love of one’s Master and Mistress.
I am afraid that this is too much for even such a dog as I am to expect.
But peace, at least, is certain. Peace and a long rest for my weary old heart and
head and limbs, and eternal sleep in the earth I have loved so well.
Perhaps, after all, this is best.
One last request, I earnestly make. I have heard my Mistress say, “When Blemie
dies we must never have another dog. I love him so much I could never love another
one”. Now I would ask her, for love of me, to have another. It would be a poor
tribute to my memory never to have a dog again. What I would like to feel is that,
having once had me in the family, she cannot live without a dog! I have never had a
narrow, jealous spirit. I have always held that most dogs are good. My successor can
hardly be as well loved or as well mannered or as distinguished and handsome as I
was in my prime. My Master and Mistress must not ask the impossible. But he will do
his best, I am sure, and even his inevitable defects will help by comparison to keep
my memory green.
To him I bequeath my collar and leash and my overcoat and raincoat He can never
wear them with the distinction I did, all eyes fixed on me in admiration; but again I
am sure he will do his utmost not to appear a mere gauche provincial dog. I hereby
wish him the happiness I know will be his in my old home. One last word of farewell,
dear Master and Mistress. Whenever you visit my grave, say to yourselves with
regret but also with happiness in your hearts at the remembrance of my long, happy
life with you:
“Here lies one who loved us and whom we loved”. No matter how deep my sleep I
shall hear you and not all the power of death can keep my spirit from wagging a
grateful tail. I will always love you as only a dog can.”
by Eugene O’Neill
The original version of this tribute was written by Eugene O’Neill for his wife