I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
Such a wonderful life together. My thoughts are with you and all Dozer’s loved ones. Take care Nagi
My deepest sympathy for your loss.
Dear Nagi, we know what you are going .
Kay
Sorry for your loss! Losing your fur baby is the hardest 🥺
Dear Nagi, how I wish I could erase your profound pain and sorrow and turn back the hands of time for you to have more precious time with your beloved Dozer. Yours was the last the last voice he heard and the last touch he felt as he left you. He will always live in your heart and you in his. My deepest condolences to you, Nagi, for Dozer’s loss.
I know how you feel. I lost my Mom and my Pixie on the same day and I didn’t think I would ever be able to recover from that. You will never forget Dozer and sometimes you will think he is with you, as long as you don’t open your eyes.
Dear Nagi
my heart is broken when i read your post, my deepest condiolencies, i went through the same and understand it is the hardest and most painful time when you loose your loved one, i wish you all the strenght and send you the warmest hug..
Lovely Nagi,
You gave Dozer an amazing life. We are holding you in our hearts.
I hope this helps:
LOVE CAME FIRST by Donna Ashworth
You don’t move on after loss, but you must move with. You must shake hands with grief, welcome her in, for she lives with you now. Pull her a chair at the table and offer her comfort. She is not the monster you first thought her to be. She is love. And she will walk with you now, stay with you now, peacefully. If you let her. And on the days when your anger is high, remember why she came, remember who she represents. Remember. Grief came to you, my friend, because love came first. Love came first.
I’ve have had to say “Goodbye” tearfully to MoochPoocho, Pooh Bear, Zephyr, Pumpkin, Dixie, Knuckles, Jesse James, and recently my sweet Rosie. I still have Tattoo, and am waiting for a new puppy to be born in May. I’ve loved them all and remember each one so very fondly. I can’t imagine life without a dog, even though that time will come. Bless you and your pup!
I am so sorry for your loss. I had to put my almost 19 year old chihuahua to sleep a few weeks ago. I still can’t stop crying.
Like so many others, i share your thoughts in processing love and loss of ypur dearest fur baby. At least be kind to yourself with the knowledge that his love and care for you was im sure mirrored back to the much loved Dozer. I hope your love for Dozer blossoms in time into rich love and memories for eternity.
No words – just love and thanks to you both for enhancing so many people’s lives. Dozer was a very special dog
Dearest Nagi, thank you for sharing Dozer with us all. Love and blessings to you from me n my Anau (Family). RIL DOZER💙💙
What a beautiful friendship you had with dozer. My heart goes out to you Nagi. Rest assured he had the best life and hang on to the beautiful memories you made together.
Vale darling Dozer. You and Dozer will be together again Nagi, this is not the end, just a transition.
Oh Nagi, I am so so sorry that Dozer has crossed the rainbow bridge. I have followed his adventures with you since I bought your first book, and have to admit, his latest story was the first thing I read in all your emails.
It is only because of our fur babies unconditional love, that we feel so heartbroken when they leave us.
Treasure all the wonderful memories you shared together, and, in time, you will feel able to speak of him without breaking down. Sending love and hugs to you and all Dozer’s many “workmates”. xx
Dear Nagi, I feel your pain and am so so sorry for your loss. Our first dog Buddy also a Goldie meant as much to us as Dozer means to you. I cried reading this post. Not a day goes past when I don’t miss him and I wish he was here to support my husband and I right now through life’s ups and downs. We’ll always remember the date he passed as it’s the day before our wedding anniversary. Same with our second dog Cooper who lived 16 years and 1 week and sadly passed a couple of years ago, the day before Xmas. Nothing can ever replace the unconditional love of our four legged friends and we’re very grateful for Ollie who’s supporting my husband and I now through the roller coaster of life. Take care and go gently 🙏💕🐶🐾
Oh, Nagi,
I am so terribly saddened to read this, and I grieve with you on your loss. You were a wonderful mom to Dozer, and he loved you with all his heart. Peace and love from Connecticut where my three golden retriever girls and I have followed your devotion to and joy with Dozer. As much as I always enjoyed reading (and trying out) your recipes, it was always the Life of Dozer that I read first. May you find comfort in knowing that you were the best mom ever for your good boy.
I have made a few of your recipes over the years; so good and easy to follow. I have so enjoyed your posts of DOZER. He seemed like an awesome companion. I am sorry for your loss 💛🫂
It is a true gift to have had such a wonderful companion such as Dozer in your life. My thoughts are with you during this difficult time.