I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
My deepest condolences to you Nagi and thank you for sharing Dozer’s life with us. I also have tears running down my face as I type this. I’ll miss your updates on Dozer. He was such a sweet boy.
Nagi, My heart goes out to you.
Our dog became seriously ill whilst I was in COVID quarantine. She knew I was away but bravely held on until I was released. We spent the next day at the beach, and she sadly passed that evening. It is so gut wrenching, and still cry thinking how brave she was that day. Hopefully the tears will pass, and the memories live on. Be strong, our thoughts and wishes to you.
Dream on DOZER in the land of eternal beaches and Mum’s cooking.
So incredibly sorry to hear this. What a beautiful tribute. Xx
I am a tragic dog lover and I cannot stop crying for you. I lost all of my west highland terriers in one year and never thought I would recover. Time eventually heals but you never forget
Di Crross
Hi Nagi I am so very sorry for your loss it’s a pain like no other thinking of you all my love and prayers xxx
So so sorry for your loss, the hardest thing in the world is losing your best doggie friend, it does get easier, although it won’t seem that way yet, having all of the lovely memories that you have will help. Thank you so much for sharing him with us as well xxx
My goodness this has broken my heart for you 💔 l totally know the pain your are feeling and the emptiness of your loss. I am crying with you just know that he will always be around you in spirit till you meet again on this other side. Look out for white butterflies l saw them all the time when l lost my boy on four legs too. Blessings love Christine
My heart goes out to you Nagi. I’ve shared Dozers life through your website for so many years. He’s crossed the rainbow bridge and is playing with all the other friends. Hope you’re OK.
Dear Nagi,
I have just read your letter to Dozer. I am so sad for you and understand so well the heartbreak you are feeling. Our beautiful labrador Molly died on the 5 Feb 2020 and I still miss her so much. We now have two Goldies – our boy Henry looks so much like Dozer and our girl Mabel has just given us the joy (and many other things!) of nine pups, so we like to spread the Goldie love wherever we can :). I wish I could tell you, he had a “good innings” (I really hate that!) – “he was so loved”, “he had a wonderful life”…all the things that ‘should’ make you feel better. And whilst you know people say these things from kindness, there are no words that can make you feel better. There is nothing to do but grieve the loss of your soul companion, your beautiful Dozer. I haven’t been on your mailing list long. My good friend told me to follow you – “you’ll love her; she has a Goldie like Henry!”. And here I am x
My heart has been heavy since reading about Dozer and both of you have been in my thoughts. Thank you for sharing Dozer with us. He was so well loved by everyone and I will treasure your cookbooks (with Dozer in it!) even more.
Good grief – literally. A SMH headline, thousands of blog comments. Pets are part of the family but the public outpouring of grief is absolutely bizarre.
Sorry – I just don’t ‘get’ whoever wrote this… they obviously don’t know Nagi or Dozer… 💔
Oh Nagi
I have cried with you reading the beautiful stories you have printed over the years but especially now at this sad time. He was a beautiful companion and he got everlasting love in return. You were a special pair with lots of happy memories❤️
Dearest Nagi and Dozer. Thank you for all the wonderful stories, photos and videos. I’m so sorry. Much love, hugs and blessings. 💙 😢 🥰
What a beautiful dedication to a magnificent doggo. We will all miss him, but what a wonderful life he had x
Dearest Nagi, so sorry for your loss, sending you lots of love and hugs xx
No words will ever be enough, however all who have loved an animal will understand.xx
Thank you for sharing your beautiful Dozer with us all. 😢😢😢
So sorry to hear of your loss Nagi. Such a precious letter in tribute of a precious boy. Thank you for sharing Dozer with the world and for sharing your love for him with us all. I know that Dozer will always be part of you.
And, thank you Dozer. I will miss seeing your stories and reading about all that you contribute to Nagi’s work and life. May you rest in peace, beautiful boy ❤️🐕
Even though Dozer is gone he will always be part of your life and entwined with all you do. Sending love and support to you Nagi ❤️
Oh Nagi, I know how much it hurts. I embrace every time I dream of my soul-dog, sometimes so vividly I’m not certain it was just a dream. These beautiful souls don’t actually leave us. Take care, broken hearts hurt the most.
HI NAGI , HI KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. Get a new love ASAP.
That is the worst and most insensitive advice you could ever give anyone! An animal is a loved member of the family- not a disposable item! I have been in this situation and I needed to grieve. Not buy another dog! Unbelievable!
Actually, Marilyn, with all due respect, I suggest you moderate your language. I have also been in this situation; however, we all react differently in these situations and to assume everyone thinks as you do is a little presumptuous.