I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
So, so sorry, Nagi.
I’m so sorry for your loss, Dozer spread so much joy and happiness.
You summed up the feelings of lossing a beloved pet and dear family member so well, thank you for being so vulnerable. These loved ones of ours really do leave paw prints on your heart.
May God bless Dozer and may he be feasting on all the good things (including chocolate!) in doggy heaven
You love of Dozer really touched my heart.
You are wonderful and Dozer loved you back just the same
Thank you for sharing
Hi Nagi, my heart goes out to you. The love between you and Dozer was truly real. Thank you and Dozer for bringing us joy! And may the coming days be gentle and kind especially when your grief is intense. 💞
Sending you love, hugs and healing during this difficult period Nagi. I hope that as time passes you will soon be able to remember Dozer and all of your beautiful memories together and smile rather than weep. Xxx
Dear Nagi. Feel so sad about Dozer. He was so cute. Rest in peace Dozer. My heart goes out to you Nagi
Big hugs for you Nagi.. thankyou for sharing your beautiful Dozer with us..💙
Nagi, I feel your pain as only a devoted dog owner can. We lost our dear girl only 4 mths ago in a similar way. Our hearts break because we loved them so dearly, they gave us such unconditional love & companionship. Time does slowly dry the tears and heal our wounded hearts.
Hi Nagi,
I read with dismay that you are facing the loss of your beautiful loved one Dozer. I too, have just lost my best friend and I do know how you feel. However, I keep a great picture of Angus Mactavish on my screen and it is a little easier to see the positive side that way, while grieving. I also lost Mactavish’s sister, “Emily” after a cancer diagnosis (she was never, ever sick) of T-cell Lymphoma – the worst Lymphoma. After 4 years of chemotherapy (the first dog in N.A. to live that long) we lost her. I was literally sick to my stomach at the mere thought of her and how wonder she was. It does get easier, but it is the time that is the problem. I know you’ll feel like you never get over this loss, and you won’t…but things will ease up on your memories and you will start to remember all the good time you had with him. Trust me, I’m there with you. Keep that beautiful memory with you at all times, and you will heal. Hugs from across the world!
I have no words to help. Just know that you are loved xx
My heart is broken and I too will miss Dozer right alongside you. He was a truly special boy. Thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers xo
So sorry for your loss Nagi x
I am crying. I am so sorry for your loss, Nagi. My usual routine is to look up a recipe, click the “Dozer button”, go back to the recipe, then make the recipe. (Sometimes I look up extra recipes just to click the “Dozer button”). My heart goes out to you. Please take care of yourself. Dozer knows he was truly, truly loved.
The most difficult loss is the one that leaves silence where love used to live.
Thank you for sharing him with us.
They certainly leave a dog-shaped hole in one’s heart when they cross the rainbow bridge. I hope you find solace knowing that he was so loved and you gave him a wonderful life. Many hugs going your way, Nagi.
Dear Nagi, just this morning my co-workers and I were talking about these moments in our lives too (caring for our pets in their final moments). And just this weekend I tried some more of your recipes (queso and pico de gallo). Thank you for courageously sharing the kindness of your heart with so many. The healing might be slow, but the happy memories will soon outshine the pain.
Proverbs 12:10 – “The righteous one takes care of …domestic animals”
My heart goes out to you for your loss. Dozer was so loved by you and your followers. Thank you for sharing. Sending love and prayers!
So sorry for your loss. What a beautiful letter. It shows he had such a good life.
Nagi, I am absolutely devastated and heartbroken to hear of the loss of your darling boy. Dozer was so deeply loved, and that love was so evident in the way you spoke about him and cared for him.
I truly understand the unconditional, precious love a golden brings into our lives. It is such a pure, loyal, once-in-a-lifetime kind of bond one we are so privileged to experience, even though it makes the goodbye so unbearably painful.
Thinking of you and holding you close in my heart during this incredibly difficult time. . May beautiful memories of your sweet Dozer bring you comfort in these difficult days ahead. 🐾🤍
Do sorry to hear of your loss. It was wonderful to hear that you were allowed to spend so much time with your boy in the surgery over Dozers’s last two weeks. I am sure Dozer would have treasured those precious moments.
Dear Nagi,
I can barely write this as tears are streaming down my face. What an absolute beauty Dozer was, you gave him the most incredible life and he will always be by your side. You have so many beautiful memories of your beautiful Dozer, that in time will help ease your pain.