I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
Dear Nagi,
I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending you hugs.
Maureen
I’m so sorry. It’s so hard. In time it gets easier. Dozer will always be a part of you. Grieve for him and you and when you’re ready there will be another to share and love
Dear Nagi, So sorry for your loss. Dozer loved you unreservedly, and I am sure he knew all that you wanted to say to him before he passed. Dogs are intuitive like that. Dozer brought so much joy to internet strangers and we thank you for sharing his photos and life with us. RIL Dozer. Sending hugs to you.
I’m so sorry for your loss Nagi. Dozer warmed so many people’s lives through you. I lost my cat and dog last March, it was horrible. Please look after yourself.
Know that I understand your grief and hope for a time of healing to come. Condolences
Dear Nagi, No words one says can take away the pain of loosing ones best mate. All I can say is that he was a very lucky boy to have someone in his life who cared for him with so much love and vice versa. I reciently lost my Boy (cat) who was always with me and every time I look at his picture i still shed tears. Thank you for sharing his life and what a wonderful life together you both had. Those memories will be etched in your heart forever. We will miss him also.
I am so deeply saddened to read this. I lost my soul cat in June and shortly later my old girl Daisy, our beloved dog. It’s been such a difficult time and even still, I cry all the time. It’s truly the most difficult pain I have endured. I’ve followed along for years with you and Dozer so it hit me harder than the usual goodbyes I read. I am writing this with tears streaming down my face. I weep for dozer, for you, for my girls and for all of us who have endured a loss so deep. Ride the waves and feel the emotions.
I’m so sorry for you loss Nagi💕
Oh Nagi, my heart breaks for you and I cannot imagine the pain you are going through right now. I’m sorry for your loss. Dozer was so lovely and would always make me smile when I read your stories about him. Sending you lots of love and big hugs xx
Here I am sobbing after reading of your loss. But, you do have all those years to remember the happiness and love. And don’t believe anyone who tells you dogs don’t go to heaven, you know as well as I that their soul is bigger and better than most people’s. He will be waiting for you on the other side.
Its changed my day to read of your loss Nagi. The fond connection you had with Dozer was evident, big hugs for you ox
I’m so sorry to read the news about Dozer and I send you all the best wishes to heal your heart. I often used to go straight to Dozer just to lift my day; he’ll be missed. But there is a beautiful poem that says, they are not gone, they merely walk within you. You’ll feel his presence sometimes and eventually it’ll make you smile.
When I lost my Nanook, it was so hard, and I cried so much. So I know, and understand what you are going through. I wish our pets lived longer, because they mean so much to us, and are such an important part of our lives. Grieving is a difficult process, but in time it does get better. Thank you for sharing Dozer with us.
Dear Nagi,
My heart aches for you with your loss of Dozer. My Jack Russell Bo has been around the same age ever since I rescued him that cold January in 2012.
He has been my constant shadow since then. He has taught me unconditional love and made life bearable in many ways. I cannot imagine life without him.
I have followed you on your website and always took pleasure in hearing about the life and adventures of Dozer.
Nagi, there is nothing I can say to ease your pain. I am told it is a process. All my love…Linda
Nagi, it’s hard to write this as. I am so sad for you! Sweet kind Dozer lived a good life with you by his side! Hearts breaking for you and your faithful companion!
💔💔💔😭😭😭😭
Dear Nagi, this is my first time commenting after years of cooking your recipes and loving your blog. What a beautiful tribute to your beautiful, special boy Dozer. You two had a wonderful life together, and the deep wonder and joy of that life is what makes the pain so hard now. As a cat mom myself who has said goodbye to beloved pets, I understand how this loss feels so awful. Please take care of yourself during this time.
Nagi, I am so sorry to hear this about Dozer.
With that said, every life comes to an end and the most important thing is what kind of life was had. Dozer’s life was one full of love and no one can ask for more than that because there is no better kind of life.
So sorry to read about Dozer. He was so much part of your website, a true friend and will be sadly missed. What a lovely tribute to him. Take care.
Oh, Nagi. I am so so sorry about Dozer. Your tribute is so meaningful. I know firsthand how much this hurts. Hugs to you.