I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
I write this from the heart as a fellow dog mum.
I once gave my entire heart to a lady Bernese Mountain dog named Greta. I received her for my 21st birthday, and she stayed with me for 12 and a half years. She passed away ten years ago this March, and I still think about her every single day. Time has moved on, life has grown, but the love never faded — and neither did the loss.
I now have two fur children, both Bernese Mountain Dogs. My older boy is 9. Because of the breed, even though he is healthy right now, I feel we are quietly entering his golden years. Loving dogs this deeply means living with that unspoken understanding that one day, your heart will break again — and you love them anyway.
I wanted to thank you — though it feels strange to say — for grieving Dozer so openly and publicly. When Greta left me, I took a month off work. I was lucky then to have bosses who understood that I wasn’t “just sad,” I was shattered.
Today, at work, a group of people were talking about how deeply sad they felt about Dozer’s passing. That moment stopped me in my tracks. It made me realise that perhaps Dozer’s legacy lives on through you — in showing people that this grief is real, that it is heavy, and that it is okay if you cannot get out of bed. That losing a dog can hollow you out in ways words can’t touch.
So often people say, “it was just a dog.”
But anyone who has truly loved one knows the truth — that dog is family. That dog is routine, comfort, laughter, safety, and unconditional love. That dog is woven into every ordinary day of your life. And when they leave, the silence they take with them is unbearable.
Your openness has helped make space for people to say, without apology: I am not okay.
And that matters more than you may ever know.
I am so deeply sorry for your loss. Dozer was extraordinary, and he was clearly loved beyond measure.
With heartfelt sympathy
A fellow dog mum
I am so sorry,Nagi. My mum took longer to recover from her fur baby loss than my dad’s death…I love dogs but I can’t have them as I start to feel guilty not to be able to give them my love as much as they give me their love.
Dozer loved you with all his heart. He will live in you and he is always with you. Take time and be kind to yourself. We are all here for you.
I’m heartbroken for you Nagi .
I was sat yesterday reading your post on instagram, I was crying and my husband asked what was wrong as it was my birthday.
I loved the relationship that you had with Dozer , a beautiful dog and you gave him a beautiful life.
Sending you lots of love and hugs from 🇬🇧
Sooo very sorry. May hear Aches for you. You & Dozer are a tandem!. 💜❤️🩹💜
Such beautiful words, Nagi, for a wonderful companion and member of your family. Dozer, rest in eternal peace. 💔
I am so devastated for you Nagi, He was your world I know how hard it will be, but only he ever knew true love and what a life he had with you – he had the best mum ever! Bye Dozer
Recently said goodbye to our beautiful rescue (GSP/Greyhound) – ZuluHe was the glue that held us all together. As you say, completely unconditional love.
We are not worthy of that love. But we then adopted another rescue quite soon thereafter. And while we always miss Zulu, young Sam definitely keeps us on our toes and no regrets in giving another rescue a great life.
xxx
Feel such sadness for you Nagi. The depth of love you had for your precious Dozer Nagi is indeed the depth of pain you will feel for the loss of him. In truth dear Nagi your Dozer is forever only a thought away from you. Rest in peace beautiful boy, God bless you both. ♥️♥️
Dear Nagi, I am sorry for your loss! Take care ! RIP for Dozer..
So sad and so sorry…..
Hugs
Rest In Peace
Dozer
You will be missed so very much
Nagi
I wish all of us your followers could hug you .
What you are feeling now is grief of a loved one who you will never forget.
Dozer so precious but please remember he is no longer in pain.
Please take the time you need and try to rest .
Dozer was so loved and had a wonderful life with you.
xoxoxoxoxoxo
So sorry for your devastating loss. RIP Dozer.❤️❤️❤️
I feel your pain. I cry with you. Your love for dozer was something that will be with you forever. He loved you and tried hard to keep going. He passed over the rainbow surrounded by love. Memories last or ever. Stay strong Nagi.
So sorry to hear of your loss. Thank you for sharing your life with Dozer.
You are who you because of Dozer and he now sleeps peacefully full of happy memories and the warmest feeling of a loving family.
‘Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened’
Xx
Oh dear Nagi, it’s heartbreaking news 💔
My thoughts are with you.
You have beautiful memories with Dozer and in time you will smile when you remember them.
But for now, let the sadness do what it has to do. Rest in peace, dearest Dozer 🙏🏻❤️
I am sorry to hear you have lost your dog Dozer my heart, love and blessings go out to you.
I am very sorry to hear your loss. Our hearts are breaking 💔
Dear Nagi. I am so sorry for your very sad loss. I know what it is like, having retrievers for the last 40 years. Unfortunately age catches up with us all, not that it makes it any easier. Stay strong, and I am sure that you have many people thinking of you, if that makes the pain any less.
Hi Nagi, I’m so sorry fir your loss. I know how you feel about losing our beloved fur babies. I remember crying under the plum tree with my husband Les when our dog Amber passed when she was 14yrs, and our first pooch Sheba. They are your children. My thoughts are with you. You just have to think of all the special times you had with him and it eventually get easier as time goes by. Kind regards Paulette Hamilton NZ