I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
Dozer had such a wonderful life with you. The sadness you are feeling just shows how much you loved and cared for him. He was a lucky pup and he loved you dearly. Big hugs, Nagi. xxxx
Oh Nagi, I’m so sorry for your loss of dozer. Keep the memories close to your heart. Please read the poem THE LAST BATTLE
It help when I just loss my beloved kooper. Hugs to you
My heart breaks for you Nagi on the loss of your beautiful Dozer. I know all the love you have around you will help you through this difficult time. Dozer lived his best life and you adored one another.
RIP beautiful Dozer 💙
Dozer was such a star – loved by all who follow “recipetineats” – he will be sorely missed by us all…. lots of love Nagi x
I am so sorry and I know how you feel after losing my Ziva over a year ago(German Shepherd). You gave him the best life and he was your faithful boy xx Hugs to you.
Dear Nagi,
Sincerest condolences for your huge loss in the passing away of Dozer. How precious your memories must be and how truly wonderful you returned your Dozer’s unconditional love in kind and gave him your heart and home. God bless .
Kris
I am so sorry for your loss you wo;; meet again xxx
A wonderful tribute to a wonderful boy. He brought such happiness to all of us.
Nagi, no matter how long we have them in our lives, it’s never long enough. I started to worry for you when I first noticed the touches of grey on his muzzle. In my 72 years I have been through this pain too many times. I found this essay a few years ago and it gives me solace through my own tears.
It came to me
That every time
I lose a dog
They take a piece
Of my heart with them,
And every new dog
Who comes into my life
Gifts me with a piece
Of their heart.
If I live long enough
All the components
Of my heart
Will be dog, and
I will become
As generous and
Loving as they are.
—-anonymous
It doesn’t matter what you said to Dozer, it only matters that your voice and touch surrounded him. Try to take comfort in your memories. x
Thank you for sharing this. I know you, I, and so very many feel Nagi’s grief as it reawakens our own special memories of joy and sadness. I’m sure sometime in the future the “right” dog will find her to again share her love – and that dog will be very different to Dozer but will bring her comfort, love and joy.
Dear Nagi,
I’m so sorry about the loss of your dog. They are never “just a pet” — they’re family. You gave him a long, loving life!
Regards. Marianna
So sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you.
Nagi, I’m so sorry for the loss of your beautiful Dozer. I hope, in time, that your memories or Dozer will bring you nothing but joy and laughs, just as he did while he was alive. Take care and spend the time you need with those closest and able to support you as you need.
Nagi my heart breaks for you.
As I read the final chapter tears streaming down my face, it reminded me of each time I had to say goodbye to each of my beloved dogs. It doesn’t get any easier I must say.
You loved Dozer and Dozer loved you, both of you loved each other unconditionally.
Dozer has crossed over the Rainbow bridge where he is well, running through fields with wind blowing through his fur. Playing with other dogs that have passed.
No more pain or illness just warm, carefree sunny days. He’ll be waiting for you.
Read the Rainbow Bridge poem.
And take heart that you were the bestest mum any dog would have been proud to have.
You have a heart bursting with memories – enjoy them!
Love and hugs
Jayne K
UK
Oh nagi I watched you both over the years and boy the tears are flowing tonight I’m feeling for you almost soul bye to our beautiful Dozer gone but never to be forgotten 😭 love Bet xo
I am so sorry to hear. He had a wonderful, love filled life with you but I know knowing that is still not enough to fill the void. I lost my Izzy and I know how you feel. It will get better with time but you will always miss him. Praying the Lord will comfort you.
So sad to hear about the loss of your gorgeous Dozer. I have followed your story all this time. He was such a great mate and constant friend. we will all miss him
I truly am sorry Nagi. I know this pain and heartache also. A piece of your heart is gone. You will one day be able to think of all the fun things you did with Dozer and you will speak of him with a smile and not through tears. But it will take time, allow yourself the time to grieve. My heart and thoughts are with you.
I am so sorry for you loss. It was so clear from all your posts how much you loved and still love Dozer. That love will never end. Sending you a massive hug from the UK
Hedartbreaking. But what a love to have had with the most beautiful dog. Sending love to you Nagi x
So sorry for your loss, Nagi. May his eternal soul always be frolicking on a beach somewhere. Sending you love and healing wishes.