I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
My girlfriend and I have been following you and Dozer for a couple years and are heartbroken that your time together has ended. Shed the tears freely – your love for him was fierce, they can’t be stopped. One day your memory of him will bring smiles, not tears.
So sorry Nagi, lots of love and hugs xxxx
Tears were streaming down my face while reading your heart wretched message. I am so sorry for your loss. Dozer was one heck of a special pup !! He gave your readers joy, love and laughters on every post. Thank you for sharing his journeys. . Time is a good healer, I hope one day you will be able to see his photos with smiles and without tears. Please take care.
Dear Nagi
My heart goes out to you as you are going through this time of deep grieving. Having lost a number of beloved furry family members I understand what you are going through.
But there is hope Nagi. Dozer is in heaven and he if feeling no pain. If you are a believer in Jesus you will be when your journey here on earth is done reunited with him.
I was listening to the testimony of a man who died and went to heaven. There are many people who have experienced the same, including a close friend of our family. He was resuscitated after his heart had stopped.
The man was greeted by his two dogs as he entered heaven. My heart was filled with so much joy knowing that I will see my beloved animals again.
May God give your peace and comfort during this time of loss but also hope knowing that this is not the end.
Sending you lots of love
Dear Nagi; my heart aches reading this post of yours to dear Dozer, from one dog mum to another, I totally feel your pain and heartache.
As much as Dozer bought joy to your life, you did the very same for him.
You were an incredible mom to Dozer and thank you so much for sharing him with us too all these years. I always look forward to reading your beautiful post on Dozer and it made me feel like I knew Dozer (even though I am thousands of miles away in Toronto Canada)
Dozer was a happy doggie having you as his mum.
RIP Dozer, you will surely be missed by all of us.
Nagi, we are sending you lots of hugs from Toronto
I’m so sorry, Nagi. We all know the day must come, as they have shorter lives than humans, but that doesn’t make it easier. My own fur baby is going on 14 yo, and I think of it with fear often. God bless you.
You were wonderful to share Dozer with us, and we loved him. We remember our dogs, now with Dozer. Our heartfelt condolences to you, dear Nagi.
Dozer was the reason why I started to follow you on YouTube. Sorry for your loss and take your time to heal. Sending hugs from Phila., PA USA.
We will always keep the “Life Of Dozer” alive in our hearts. He has given us so many smiles over the years and now we share the tears. Just as all the photos framed in your home, we will always have him framed in our hearts. Thank you for sharing him with us all these many years. May you see him again one day.
My sincerest condolences to you on the loss of your precious Dozier. May you find comfort in the wonderful memories of him that will always be in your heart.
I am so sorry. I’m sitting here crying, too, because I got to love Dozer during all the years of following you. I know how much you are hurting because I lost my girl 2 months ago. But we’d do it all over again, wouldn’t we? Because we loved them.
Our wonderful furry family members get a piece of our heart that no human can reach and it really hurts when they have to leave us.
I still cry for my sweet Bailey and miss her every day, just as I cried for you and Dozer this morning.
Thank you for sharing his amazing life with us, as well as everything else you do.
Dozer lived the best life he could with somebody who loved him in every way, making you both lucky to have had that time together.
The best thing you have now are those years of memories together and a love that compares to no other.
I’m sending a hug, and all my understanding of what you feel today.
I always like to believe that we will again meet up with our doggie kids on the other side of Rainbow Bridge.
Nagi, I was gutted to hear about Dozer. I’ve been following your blog for many years and have always looked forward to hearing about Dozer’s adventure! Your letter to him has me still crying. I believe that e are better people when we have the blessing of owning a pet. I hope that the profound love that you will always have for him brings you some measure of comfort. I’ve been in your shoes and know the impact that losing a pet has on our lives. Nagi you gave him the most wonderful life and I am certain that he’s sending you loads of thanks for all that you did for him. He clearly knew that he was LOVED. The pain will get easier, but your heart will never be the same. With much love from the US, Beth
Oh Nagi, sending you my most sincere condolences on the loss of your beloved Dozer. How fortunate you both were to have had each other – the love and loyalty Dozer showed you was a reflection of the love and loyalty you gave him. RIP Dozer, sending your mum a big hug from Canada.
After discovering your blog many years ago, I became one of those readers that clicked on Dozer before reading the recipe As us older dog people know this happens and it is always painful. I add my sympathy and thoughts to the many tributes in this thread. I hope you know how much including Dozer in your writing brought joy to many around the world. He is missed. I will give my Gracie an extra hug today. Stay strong.
Cape Cod, USA
No words, only tears. So sorry for your loss.
Sending big hugs. ❤️
Being a dog lover all my life and being blessed with several over those years, your journey is one I have done several times. There are not words enough to express the sadness and loss.
I too have done those last days and moments and reading your words takes you back to them as if they were yesterday.
Our pets are family and each leaves a hole in our soul and memories of joy to mourn until they return as memories we will forever cherish.
Nagi,
I am in tears as I just loved Dozer and I feel for you, your family and all the RT team.
Over the years following Dozer (and you) my favourite photo/video is the one where he was playing in the water with his Golden Retriever doggy pals (my little Penny loved it)
My thoughts are with you all, look
love Andie P xxxx
Nagi, I have been making your recipes for years- your food has brought a lot of joy to a lot of people – but Dozer. Ah Dozer. He was the cherry on top of that joy. And then some (and I am not even “a dog person” – I know…).
He was clearly so loved, and loved you so much.
Thank you for allowing us to be part of his journey.
Take good care x